You took on the parenting role for adults in your formative years and now that you are an adult you are experiencing what feels like unexplainable burn out. The tiredness you are experiencing is from overexertion as a child. You were the parentified child. When you should’ve be playing, you were making breakfast, lunch and dinner for the adults, you were standing on your feet too much doing house chores and running errands, you were never allowed to sit still. Every time you hear the door open or the sound of their car coming home you immediately get up and find something to do. You’ve been shamed for being lazy. You clean surfaces that don’t need cleaning to get busy. You’ve not only taken on the role of parent but also the role of a maid and even the role of a nanny for your siblings.
You were taking on the behavior of putting adults to bed turning off lights in the house, locking doors, when they should be the one putting you to bed and telling you bed time stories. This unexplainable burn out that keeps latching onto your muscles and your psyche preventing you from doing anything and even as far as sabotaging can even be a manifestation of the fibromyalgia. You are tired even when you do everything right, eating healthy and working out. I see you and I know how you feel. The body is tired. It needs more Laying down, more sleep, more laughs, more play and it needs you to surround yourself with people who nourish you not DEMAND more from you. You’ve had way too much demands on the muscles while they were still forming. Your emotional body is overextended; you’ve had to FEEL TOO MUCH too early while your brain was still forming.
Your body needs you to remove yourself from people who take and take from you. It needs you to stop over giving and over performing. The familiarity of this overexertion as a child (DOING EVERYTHING FOR EVERYONE) and even go as far as manifesting partners who are passive and as result you are back to that place; the place where you were carrying all of the emotional labor of the house and now your relationship. Nothing gets done if you don’t do it. But It’s time for you to REST. Receive true REST. You are sabotaging everything you really want to do because your cells are calling your attention to give yourself TRUE DEEP REST. The type of rest that you feel deep in your bones. Breatheeee into it, breatheee into your belly, breatheeee deep into your psyche, into your muscles, inhale deep and then exhaleeeeeeee IT all out. As you do this, you will yawn, tears will falls down the side of your eye as you release it all.
I wrote this for you because it is time for you to give yourself the permission to receive safe LOVE, RECEIVE safe TOUCH, LAUGH, PLAY, and NOURISH your spirit. I recommend taking a trip to a place with slow energy; a place where life is slow and nature is alive. Leave the hustle and bustle of the city, leave the fast paced environment and go to a quiet place where you can hear a rooster or the birds chirping, a place where food is alive. A place you can connect with the natural order and cycle of life. A place where you can nourish yourself because you deserve it. One of my favorite place like this to go to is Hawaii. I go there whenever I need to slowwwwww down in a safe place, eat real food, connect with nature and people who are in tune with humanity, bathe in the sun and in the ocean. There are many places like that like the Caribbean islands and even islands in Africa; and it doesn’t have to be expensive. There are many affordable travel packages. You can get cheap flight and hotel packages on Expedia on their packages here
